Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Odds & Ends

Warning: this post has nothing to do with knitting or photography.

It also contains mainly negative thoughts/news/feelings. It is largely cathartic for myself alone and therefore you may wish to skip reading it.

Consider yourself warned.

Got a financial statement from my retirement fund. I lost a little over $30K last year from retirement savings. Virtually 1/3 of my savings. Gone. Kaput. I find this uber depressing. In a world where I've been wondering if I'm not actually already experiencing some depression, this was not the news I needed. (If I were still in ministry and facing this, I don't think I could cope.)

The governor has raised the state budget cuts from 1.5% to 6.5% across the board. Of course this sets badly with my DH who assumes at least hourly now that he is going to lose his job or have his salary slashed. Last night he mentioned aloud that I might need to get "a real job" sooner rather than later. By that I know he means full-time, possibly with benefits.

I try to take a deep breath and say thank you that at least our house is paid for and we won't be losing it. We will have a roof over our heads at the very least.

I got another rejection letter r.e. my book proposal. It is not a good time to think one might make a profit from either writing or fine art photography.

Everything at work seems to be such a hassle lately. I find myself banging my head on the wall and wondering if it's me. Am I doing something wrong? Why do projects keep taking a sour turn?

I am having my first doubts as to whether we will actually pull off college for the kids. I have always been the one who was certain they could go where they wanted and become whatever they wanted to be. (I still believe that last part!) Now, I'm not so sure we can even afford the state schools. DH's pessimism spreads I'm afraid.

All I feel like doing is crawling back into bed.

I warned you.

3 comments:

Beverly said...

Your concerns are understandable ... fears are contagious. I would offer suggestions but they would sound trite. I'm happy that you have your home paid for, too. That is definitely something huge to be thankful for!
2009 should bring changes for many people all over the world. Try to stay strong and ... knit!

kshotz said...

Thanks! Knitting is one way to stay sane....and you should see my sock yarn stash!

Val M. said...

I'm right there with you chick! Ryan might be putting off college for a year until he can afford it... We'll know more in a few weeks when we go and find out how much this place costs.... But he'll be doing it the same way Robb & I did, ourselves. The only thing my parents were able to pay for while I was in college was house and food, but I commuted, so that part was easy.
Don't worry. If your kids want to go to college and have a drive to go, they'll figure it out and go. With or without your funds. There are a lot of ways to afford college without parents having to pay for it up front.
Maybe that's why I've thrown myself into sewing more lately... It is cathartic and takes my mind off of financial matters, as well as reassures me that YES I CAN figure SOMETHING out! :)